When You're Broken
Y’all. I snapped at kids before dinner last night. There were many factors including too much screen time, miscommunication, unmet expectations, and the natural wild noisy chaos of having children.
🌿But NONE of those aspects stripped me of that which Jesus has created me for. None of those stole my salvation, or even my sanctification. Absolutely none of those aspects had any bearing on my worth and value, or my ultimate purpose to glorify God.
🌿And yet I allowed momentary inconveniences to overshadow my eternal calling.
🌿I’m no longer #OnlyHuman. I have been infused by the Holy Spirit, covered in the power of Christ, and I have the absolute promise that God is faithful, and will not let me be tempted beyond my ability, but with the temptation He will also provide a way of escape. (1Cor 10:13).
🌿But 𝐈 𝐭𝐫𝐚𝐝𝐞𝐝 𝐭𝐡𝐚𝐭 𝐬𝐮𝐩𝐞𝐫𝐧𝐚𝐭𝐮𝐫𝐚𝐥 𝐩𝐨𝐰𝐞𝐫 𝐨𝐟 𝐥𝐨𝐧𝐠 𝐬𝐮𝐟𝐟𝐞𝐫𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐥𝐨𝐯𝐞 𝐟𝐨𝐫 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐩𝐫𝐢𝐝𝐞 𝐨𝐟 𝐛𝐞𝐢𝐧𝐠 “𝐫𝐢𝐠𝐡𝐭,” pushed aside the ever-ready offer of heavenly peace, and caused the image bearers of God—whom He has commissioned me to safeguard—to be wounded by my frustrated words, rather than for them to see Jesus in me.
🌿Yes, all mothers get frustrated. All children can be annoying at times. People get tired and respond irrationally. I understand that. Yet if I use those aspects of humanity as excuses for why my old self suffocated my reflection of Christ, I have in effect crucified Jesus all over again for that which He already paid.
🌿𝐒𝐨 𝐰𝐡𝐞𝐫𝐞 𝐝𝐨 𝐈 𝐠𝐨 𝐟𝐫𝐨𝐦 𝐡𝐞𝐫𝐞? 𝐓𝐨 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐜𝐫𝐨𝐬𝐬. 𝐀𝐥𝐰𝐚𝐲𝐬, 𝐞𝐯𝐞𝐫, 𝐨𝐧𝐥𝐲 𝐭𝐨 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐜𝐫𝐨𝐬𝐬. Not for forgiveness, as my sins were paid for long ago. But to confess, expressing sorrow over my sin, with my heart’s prayer agreeing with God about who I am, who He is, and who He has called me to be.
🌿And then to the little ones I sinned against. To reflect Jesus to them in the way I pursue unity, and peace with humility.
🌿And then I go to my circumstances and make some changes. I must re-order my day to negate similar contexts in which it is so easy to fall into this sin again. I must communicate clearly the areas in which I need assistance. And I must pray all the more fiercely for the preemptive grace to see a the route of escape alongside the coming temptation, and humility to take the righteous path.
🌿And right now that looks like a mommy timeout, and extra kisses at bedtime.
🌿𝐈𝐭 𝐢𝐬 𝐎𝐊 𝐭𝐨 𝐛𝐞 𝐛𝐫𝐨𝐤𝐞𝐧, 𝐢𝐟 𝐢𝐭 𝐥𝐞𝐚𝐝𝐬 𝐲𝐨𝐮 𝐭𝐨 𝐉𝐞𝐬𝐮𝐬. 𝐁𝐞𝐜𝐚𝐮𝐬𝐞 𝐰𝐢𝐭𝐡 𝐉𝐞𝐬𝐮𝐬 𝐞𝐯𝐞𝐫𝐲 𝐛𝐫𝐨𝐤𝐞𝐧𝐧𝐞𝐬𝐬 𝐡𝐨𝐥𝐝𝐬 𝐡𝐚𝐧𝐝𝐬 𝐰𝐢𝐭𝐡 𝐡𝐨𝐩𝐞.
🌿And so, my friends, I wish to share my brokenness with you, in hopes that it would lead you to know God more, as that is what His sovereignty has done for me.❤️